John Cooper Clarke

FRIDAY 1ST NOVEMBER 2013

7.00pm - 10.00pm

£20.00


The Poet Laureate of Punk returns to Glasgow for a specil show at the SWG3 venue on Kelvinhaugh St.

SWG3 – Studio Warehouse, 100 Eastvale Place, Glasgow, G3 8QG.

==========================

Like a Night Club in the morning, you’re the bitter end.
Like a recently disinfected shit-house, you’re clean round the bend.
You give me the horrors
too bad to be true
All of my tomorrow’s
are lousy coz of you.

You put the Shat in Shatter
Put the Pain in Spain
Your germs are splattered about
Your face is just a stain

You’re certainly no raver, commonly known as a drag.
Do us all a favour, here… wear this polythene bag.

You’re like a dose of scabies,
I’ve got you under my skin.
You make life a fairy tale… Grimm!

People mention murder, the moment you arrive.
I’d consider killing you if I thought you were alive.
You’ve got this slippery quality,
it makes me think of phlegm,
and a dual personality
I hate both of them.

Your bad breath, vamps disease, destruction, and decay.
Please, please, please, please, take yourself away.
Like a death a birthday party,
you ruin all the fun.
Like a sucked and spat our smartie,
you’re no use to anyone.
Like the shadow of the guillotine
on a dead consumptive’s face.
Speaking as an outsider,
what do you think of the human race

You went to a progressive psychiatrist.
He recommended suicide…
before scratching your bad name off his list,
and pointing the way outside.

You hear laughter breaking through, it makes you want to fart.
You’re heading for a breakdown,
better pull yourself apart.

Your dirty name gets passed about when something goes amiss.
Your attitudes are platitudes,
just make me wanna piss.

What kind of creature bore you
Was is some kind of bat
They can’t find a good word for you,
but I can…
TWAT.

www.johncooperclarke.com

Over 18s only


Buy Tickets

Not available online at this time


SWG3

100 Eastvale Place
Glasgow
Lanarkshire
United Kingdom
G3 8QG

Venue Details



MON 29 MAY 2017
Pinegrove
Summerhall, EdinburghDoors 7.30pm£14.00
TUE 30 MAY 2017
Molly Burch
Glad Cafe, ShawlandsDoors 7.30pm£8.00
WED 31 MAY 2017
Silver Apples
Stereo, Glasgow7.30 p.m.£15.00
THU 1 JUN 2017
Champs
Hug & Pint, Glasgow7.30pm£7.00
FRI 2 JUN 2017
First Hate
Hug & Pint, Glasgow7.30 pm£7.00
MON 5 JUN 2017
Froth
Hug & Pint, Glasgow7.30pm£7.50
WED 7 JUN 2017
Kite Base
Hug & Pint, GlasgowDoors 7:30pm£7.50
SAT 10 JUN 2017
Steve Ignorant (Crass)
Hug & Pint, Glasgow7.30 p.m.£12.50
Melt Banana
Stereo, Glasgow7.30pm£13.50
SUN 11 JUN 2017
Melt Banana
The Caves - Unusual Venues Edinburgh , EdinburghDoors 7.30pm£13.50
FRI 16 JUN 2017
Dr Hook starring Dennis Locorriere
Kelvingrove Bandstand, Glasgow7.00 p.m.£37.50
SAT 17 JUN 2017
Dr Hook starring Dennis Locorriere
Kelvingrove Bandstand, Glasgow7.00 p.m.£37.50 (x1 return)
SUN 18 JUN 2017
Pile
Hug & Pint, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£11.00
All We Are
Stereo, GlasgowDoors 8.00pm£8.50
TUE 20 JUN 2017
The Hug and Pint's 2nd Birthday
Hug & Pint, GlasgowDoors 7.00pm£10.00
MON 26 JUN 2017
Start To End : Jeff Buckley - Grace
Hug & Pint, GlasgowDoors 8:00pm£10.00
TUE 27 JUN 2017
Kiefer Sutherland
O2 ABC, Glasgow7.00 p.m£25.00
THU 29 JUN 2017
75 Dollar Bill
Hug & Pint, Glasgow7.30pm£9.00
SAT 1 JUL 2017
Aidan O'Rourke & Kit Downes
Glad Cafe, ShawlandsDoors 7:30pm£11.00
MON 3 JUL 2017
Yorkston / Thorne / Khan
Hug & Pint, GlasgowDoors 7:30pm£13.00
WED 5 JUL 2017
Rising Appalachia
Hug & Pint, Glasgow7.30 p.m.£12.00
SAT 22 JUL 2017
The National Whisky Festival
Edinburgh Corn Exchange, Edinburgh£40
TUE 1 AUG 2017
Pikacyu - Makoto
Nice N Sleazy, GlasgowDoors 8pm£10.00
THU 3 AUG 2017
Frankie Cosmos
The Mash House, EdinburghDoors 7.30pm£10.50
THU 17 AUG 2017
Blazin' Fiddles
Mackintosh Queens Cross Church, Glasgow7.30pm£16.50
Adam Torres
Hug & Pint, GlasgowDoors 7.00pm£7.00
WED 30 AUG 2017
Mdou Moctar
Mono, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£15.00
Mac DeMarco
Usher Hall, EdinburghDoors 7.30pm£20.00
THU 31 AUG 2017
Courtney Marie Andrews
St Luke's, Glasgow7.30 pm£12.50
SUN 3 SEP 2017
American Football
Summerhall, EdinburghDoors 7.30pm£23.50
SAT 9 SEP 2017
Margaret Glaspy
CCA, GlasgowDoors 7:30pm£13.00