John Cooper Clarke

FRIDAY 1ST NOVEMBER 2013

7.00pm - 10.00pm

£20.00


The Poet Laureate of Punk returns to Glasgow for a specil show at the SWG3 venue on Kelvinhaugh St.

SWG3 – Studio Warehouse, 100 Eastvale Place, Glasgow, G3 8QG.

==========================

Like a Night Club in the morning, you’re the bitter end.
Like a recently disinfected shit-house, you’re clean round the bend.
You give me the horrors
too bad to be true
All of my tomorrow’s
are lousy coz of you.

You put the Shat in Shatter
Put the Pain in Spain
Your germs are splattered about
Your face is just a stain

You’re certainly no raver, commonly known as a drag.
Do us all a favour, here… wear this polythene bag.

You’re like a dose of scabies,
I’ve got you under my skin.
You make life a fairy tale… Grimm!

People mention murder, the moment you arrive.
I’d consider killing you if I thought you were alive.
You’ve got this slippery quality,
it makes me think of phlegm,
and a dual personality
I hate both of them.

Your bad breath, vamps disease, destruction, and decay.
Please, please, please, please, take yourself away.
Like a death a birthday party,
you ruin all the fun.
Like a sucked and spat our smartie,
you’re no use to anyone.
Like the shadow of the guillotine
on a dead consumptive’s face.
Speaking as an outsider,
what do you think of the human race

You went to a progressive psychiatrist.
He recommended suicide…
before scratching your bad name off his list,
and pointing the way outside.

You hear laughter breaking through, it makes you want to fart.
You’re heading for a breakdown,
better pull yourself apart.

Your dirty name gets passed about when something goes amiss.
Your attitudes are platitudes,
just make me wanna piss.

What kind of creature bore you
Was is some kind of bat
They can’t find a good word for you,
but I can…
TWAT.

www.johncooperclarke.com

Over 18s only

Buy Tickets

Not available online at this time


SWG3

100 Eastvale Place
Glasgow
Lanarkshire
United Kingdom
G3 8QG

http://www.swg3.tv

Venue Details



WED 27 MAY 2015
Miaoux Miaoux
Stereo, GlasgowDoors 7.00pm£8.00
THU 28 MAY 2015
Babes In Toyland
Oran Mor, GlasgowDoors 7.00pm£15.00
FRI 5 JUN 2015
John Cooper Clarke
Platform, GlasgowDoors 7.00pm£20.00
MON 8 JUN 2015
Robyn Hitchcock
Mono, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£13.50
FRI 12 JUN 2015
BDY PRTS
Stereo, Glasgow7.00 p.m.£7.00
Gemma Hayes
Andrew Mitchell (The Hazey Janes/Idlewild)
Electric Circus , Edinburgh7pm £16.50
Lisa Mitchell & Cara Mitchell
Oran Mor, GlasgowDoors 7.00pm£10.00
SAT 13 JUN 2015
Gemma Hayes
Oran Mor, GlasgowDoors 7.00pm£16.50
WED 17 JUN 2015
Pile
Nice N Sleazy, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£7.00
THU 18 JUN 2015
Dan Deacon
CCA, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£11.50
MON 22 JUN 2015
Natalie Prass
Chanelle McGuinness
Mono, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£11.00
SAT 27 JUN 2015
Peggy Seeger
Oran Mor, GlasgowDoors 7.00pm£17.50
Alden Penner (The Unicorns) + Michael Cera
Electric Circus , EdinburghDoors 7pm£10.00
SUN 26 JUL 2015
The Saints
Electric Circus , Edinburgh7.30pm£15.00
SUN 9 AUG 2015
The Tubes ft. Fee Waybill
The Art School, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£23.00
WED 12 AUG 2015
The Tubes Ft: Fee Waybill
Liquid Room, EdinburghDoors 7.30pm£23.00
MON 17 AUG 2015
Martha Reeves & The Vandellas
Assembly Rooms, Edinburgh9pm£20.00
WED 19 AUG 2015
Joan of Arc
Mono, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£10.00
WED 2 SEP 2015
Natalie Prass
Electric Circus , Edinburgh7pm£12.50
MON 7 SEP 2015
Mac DeMarco
Dinner
O2 ABC, Glasgow7pm£15.00
THU 15 OCT 2015
From The Jam Ft Bruce Foxton *Plase note change of date*
Lemon Tree, Aberdeen£21.00
FRI 16 OCT 2015
From The Jam Ft Bruce Foxton
Liquid Room, EdinburghDoors 7pm £21.00
SAT 17 OCT 2015
From The Jam ft. Bruce Foxton *rescheduled from 1/5/15 Please note change of date and venue
SWG3, GlasgowDoors 7.00pm£21.00
TUE 20 OCT 2015
Tallest Man On Earth
O2 ABC 1, Glasgow7.00 p.m.£21.00
THU 22 OCT 2015
Songhoy Blues
SWG3, GlasgowDoors 7.00pm£12.00
MON 2 NOV 2015
Blackalicious
Stereo, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£15.00
SAT 14 NOV 2015
Dreadzone
Electric Circus , Edinburgh7pm £16.50
THU 10 DEC 2015
The Beat
La Belle Angele, Edinburgh7PM £19.00
FRI 11 DEC 2015
The Beat
SWG3, Glasgow7pm£19.00