John Cooper Clarke

FRIDAY 1ST NOVEMBER 2013

7.00pm - 10.00pm

£20.00


The Poet Laureate of Punk returns to Glasgow for a specil show at the SWG3 venue on Kelvinhaugh St.

SWG3 – Studio Warehouse, 100 Eastvale Place, Glasgow, G3 8QG.

==========================

Like a Night Club in the morning, you’re the bitter end.
Like a recently disinfected shit-house, you’re clean round the bend.
You give me the horrors
too bad to be true
All of my tomorrow’s
are lousy coz of you.

You put the Shat in Shatter
Put the Pain in Spain
Your germs are splattered about
Your face is just a stain

You’re certainly no raver, commonly known as a drag.
Do us all a favour, here… wear this polythene bag.

You’re like a dose of scabies,
I’ve got you under my skin.
You make life a fairy tale… Grimm!

People mention murder, the moment you arrive.
I’d consider killing you if I thought you were alive.
You’ve got this slippery quality,
it makes me think of phlegm,
and a dual personality
I hate both of them.

Your bad breath, vamps disease, destruction, and decay.
Please, please, please, please, take yourself away.
Like a death a birthday party,
you ruin all the fun.
Like a sucked and spat our smartie,
you’re no use to anyone.
Like the shadow of the guillotine
on a dead consumptive’s face.
Speaking as an outsider,
what do you think of the human race

You went to a progressive psychiatrist.
He recommended suicide…
before scratching your bad name off his list,
and pointing the way outside.

You hear laughter breaking through, it makes you want to fart.
You’re heading for a breakdown,
better pull yourself apart.

Your dirty name gets passed about when something goes amiss.
Your attitudes are platitudes,
just make me wanna piss.

What kind of creature bore you
Was is some kind of bat
They can’t find a good word for you,
but I can…
TWAT.

www.johncooperclarke.com

Over 18s only


Buy Tickets

Not available online at this time


SWG3

100 Eastvale Place
Glasgow
Lanarkshire
United Kingdom
G3 8QG

Venue Details



SUN 29 APR 2018
Slug
Hug & Pint, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£8.00
Natalie Prass
Mono, GlasgowDoors 7:30pm£13.00
MON 30 APR 2018
Katie Von Schleicher
Hug & Pint, Glasgow7.30 p.m.£7.50
TUE 1 MAY 2018
Iglooghost (Brainfeeder)
Hug & Pint, GlasgowDoors 7:30pm£ 8.00
THU 3 MAY 2018
Seun Kuti
& Egypt 80
Oran Mor, GlasgowDoors 7.00pm£25.00
Steven Adams & The French Drops
Hug & Pint, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£10.00
SHONEN KNIFE
Stereo, GlasgowDoors 8pm£15.00
FRI 4 MAY 2018
Adam Stafford
Hug & Pint, Glasgow7.30pm£8.00
MON 7 MAY 2018
Vundabar
Hug & Pint, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£7.50
TUE 8 MAY 2018
Anna Burch
Hug & Pint, GlasgowDoors 7:30pm£7.00
THU 10 MAY 2018
Nap Eyes
Hug & Pint, Glasgow7.30 p.m.£8.50
FRI 11 MAY 2018
Start to End perform Dark Side of the Moon
Mackintosh Queens Cross Church, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£20.00
SAT 12 MAY 2018
Simone Felice
Pleasance Theatre, Edinburgh7pm£18.50
Start to End perform Dark Side of the Moon
Mackintosh Queens Cross Church, GlasgowDoors 7.30pmsold out
SUN 13 MAY 2018
Simone Felice
Mackintosh Queens Cross Church, Glasgow7pm£18.50
MON 14 MAY 2018
Circuit Des Yeux
Mono, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£11.50
THU 17 MAY 2018
Aidan Moffat & RM Hubbert
Saint Luke's, GlasgowDoors 7:00pm£16.00
FRI 18 MAY 2018
Broken Records
Stereo, Glasgow7.00pm£7.00
Babybird
Hug & Pint, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£15.00
Kitty, Daisy & Lewis
The Art School, GlasgowDoors 7:30pm£16.00
SAT 19 MAY 2018
Mr Boom
Mackintosh Queens Cross Church, Glasgow10am£10 / £8
SUN 20 MAY 2018
Men I Trust
Hug & Pint, Glasgow7.30 p.m£8.00
Men I Trust
Hug & Pint, Glasgow7.30 p.m£8.00
Chali 2na & Krafty Kuts
Stereo, GlasgowDoors 7:30pm£16.50
MON 21 MAY 2018
Bully
Hug & Pint, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£9.00
Japanese Breakfast
Mono, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£10.00
TUE 22 MAY 2018
Cosmo Sheldrake
Hug & Pint, Glasgow7.30pm£8.00
Sparks *please note change of venue
O2 Academy, GlasgowDoors 7.00pm£27.50
Bully
Sneaky Pete's, EdinburghDoors 7pm£9.00
THU 24 MAY 2018
Robyn Hitchcock
Oran Mor, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm £15.50
The Wandering Hearts
Mackintosh Church, GlasgowDoors 7.30pmSOLD OUT