John Cooper Clarke

FRIDAY 1ST NOVEMBER 2013

7.00pm - 10.00pm

£20.00


The Poet Laureate of Punk returns to Glasgow for a specil show at the SWG3 venue on Kelvinhaugh St.

SWG3 – Studio Warehouse, 100 Eastvale Place, Glasgow, G3 8QG.

==========================

Like a Night Club in the morning, you’re the bitter end.
Like a recently disinfected shit-house, you’re clean round the bend.
You give me the horrors
too bad to be true
All of my tomorrow’s
are lousy coz of you.

You put the Shat in Shatter
Put the Pain in Spain
Your germs are splattered about
Your face is just a stain

You’re certainly no raver, commonly known as a drag.
Do us all a favour, here… wear this polythene bag.

You’re like a dose of scabies,
I’ve got you under my skin.
You make life a fairy tale… Grimm!

People mention murder, the moment you arrive.
I’d consider killing you if I thought you were alive.
You’ve got this slippery quality,
it makes me think of phlegm,
and a dual personality
I hate both of them.

Your bad breath, vamps disease, destruction, and decay.
Please, please, please, please, take yourself away.
Like a death a birthday party,
you ruin all the fun.
Like a sucked and spat our smartie,
you’re no use to anyone.
Like the shadow of the guillotine
on a dead consumptive’s face.
Speaking as an outsider,
what do you think of the human race

You went to a progressive psychiatrist.
He recommended suicide…
before scratching your bad name off his list,
and pointing the way outside.

You hear laughter breaking through, it makes you want to fart.
You’re heading for a breakdown,
better pull yourself apart.

Your dirty name gets passed about when something goes amiss.
Your attitudes are platitudes,
just make me wanna piss.

What kind of creature bore you
Was is some kind of bat
They can’t find a good word for you,
but I can…
TWAT.

www.johncooperclarke.com

Over 18s only


Buy Tickets

Not available online at this time


SWG3

100 Eastvale Place
Glasgow
Lanarkshire
United Kingdom
G3 8QG

Venue Details



TUE 28 MAR 2017
LVL UP
Hug & Pint, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£7.50
THU 30 MAR 2017
Francois & The Atlas Mountains
Mono, Glasgow7.30 pm£11.00
FRI 31 MAR 2017
Nathan Fake (live)
Stereo, Glasgow7.30pm11.00
Desperate Journalist + Life Model
Nice N Sleazy, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£7.00
MON 3 APR 2017
Lisa O'neill
Hug & Pint, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£8.00
WED 5 APR 2017
Manu Delgado Handmade
Hug & Pint, GlasgowDoors 7.30pm£10.00
SAT 15 APR 2017
PWR BTTM
CCA, GlasgowDoors 7:30pmSold Out
MON 17 APR 2017
Part Chimp
Stereo, Glasgow7.30pm£11.50
FRI 21 APR 2017
Blanck Mass
CCA, Glasgow7.00 p.m£11.00
SAT 22 APR 2017
BC Camplight (Solo Piano Show)
Stereo, GlasgowDoors 7.00pm£10.00
MON 24 APR 2017
Splashh
Hug & Pint, GlasgowDoors 7:30 pm£8.00
SAT 29 APR 2017
Thor + Friends
Hug & Pint, Glasgow7.30 pm£10.00
Washington Irving - 'August 1914' Album Launch
Stereo, GlasgowDoors 7.00pm£10.00
TUE 2 MAY 2017
Hoops
Hug & Pint, Glasgow7.30pm£7.00
FRI 5 MAY 2017
Babe
Old Hairdressers, GlasgowDoors 7:30pm£7.00
TUE 9 MAY 2017
Howie Payne (Full Band)
Stereo, GlasgowDoors 7:30pm£10.00
THU 18 MAY 2017
Swans + Little Annie
Oran Mor, Glasgow7.00pm£27.00
SUN 21 MAY 2017
Jenn Grant
Hug & Pint, GlasgowDoors 7:30pm£10.00
MON 22 MAY 2017
Priests
Hug & Pint, Glasgow7.30 p.m.£8.00
THU 25 MAY 2017
Lisa Mitchell
Mono, GlasgowDoors 7:30pm£10.00
SAT 27 MAY 2017
Jolie Holland & Samantha Parton
CCA, Glasgow7.00 p.m.£16.00
BMX Bandits
St Luke's, Glasgow7.00pm£16.00
Damien Dempsey
La Belle Angele, EdinburghDoors 7pm£18.00
MON 29 MAY 2017
Pinegrove
Summerhall, EdinburghDoors 7.30pm£14.00
TUE 30 MAY 2017
Molly Burch
Glad Cafe, ShawlandsDoors 7.30pm£8.00
WED 31 MAY 2017
Silver Apples
Stereo, Glasgow7.30 p.m.£15.00
THU 1 JUN 2017
Champs
Hug & Pint, Glasgow7.30pm£7.00
MON 5 JUN 2017
Froth
Hug & Pint, Glasgow7.30pm£7.50
SAT 10 JUN 2017
Melt Banana
Stereo, Glasgow7.30pm£13.50
SUN 11 JUN 2017
Melt Banana
The Caves - Unusual Venues Edinburgh , EdinburghDoors 7.30pm£13.50
FRI 16 JUN 2017
Dr Hook starring Dennis Locorriere
Kelvingrove Bandstand, Glasgow7.00 p.m.£37.50